Looking for Grandmother (for Alice Walker)

I wake up

searching my room for

something

dazed and confused

I

wake up

searching my soul for --

I turn my pages

thirsty

searching for --

the water

fleeing from the fountain

I crawl under every last

something

drops searching

every last corner of my dreamscape for

blue and

purple

underwater something

under the water-dots

I search

the foggy steam of

my morning coffee

behind the mirror

crack that swallows

something

I search

under the bed

behind my dreams

in a box

labeled

"I search"

for

foxes

red lights

guiding stars

through pine tree

forests

playing

hide and seek with

Venus in the evening sky

searching death

or

you

or

something.